Be a coward & Surrender or Be noble & Live your life

"In the name of the best within you, do not sacrifice this world to those who are its worst. In the name of the values that keep you alive, do not let your vision of man be distorted by the ugly, the cowardly, the mindless in those who have never achieved his title. Do not lose your knowledge that man's proper estate is an upright posture, an intransigent mind and a step that travels unlimited roads. Do not let your fire go out, spark by irreplaceable spark, in the hopeless swamps of the approximate, the not-quite, the not-yet, the not-at-all. Do not let the hero in your soul perish, in lonely frustration for the life you deserved, but have never been able to reach. Check your road and the nature of your battle. The world you desired can be won, it exists, it is real, it is possible, it's yours.” Ayn Rand (Russian born American Writer & Novelist, 1905-1982)

All Woman?

Just FYI, this is the track I was listening to while writing this blog post.

This article on Lynn Tilton in the New York Magazine was a real treat for me.

An interesting man with whom my Beloved and I have befriended, forwarded it to me. And I must admit that I am a bit confused as to why he felt compelled to send it to me. Did she remind him of me?  A part of me recognizes that this woman could easily be a cartoon version of me. I had never heard of Lynn Tilton before. But as I was reading the article, I was going from "WOW!" to "WTF?" back to "Yes, Woman!" but again to "Are you freaking serious?"And if nothing else, I am simply compelled by the stories of unusual entrepreneurs.

Like Lynn Tilton, I am bold, mouthy, a control freak, extremely sexual, love business (which I view as the greatest force of good in the world), adore my femininity/sensuality and playing with it everywhere all of the time (especially when men fall willing victims of it :) )

I still have not made up my mind on this woman and where she is trying to go, but I can share what I like and do not like about her:

LIKE, +++++, PROs, SHE ROCKS

  • She is a full woman ("an all woman" in her own words). I am profoundly disturbed, annoyed and saddened by all the mutant females that inhabit corporate boardrooms and meetings nowadays, all these so-called women who are consumed in their efforts to imitate men so much that the only thing they have left of being woman are breasts, literally! She understands that there are other ways to stand up to men so that they get "I'll be your girlfriend, but I won't be your b****" . I want to see women bring more beauty and sensuality to this world.
  • She gets the power of business, especially industry and manufacturing-based economy for a country.  She takes seriously how employment ensures peace and a happy society. JOBS, JOBS, JOBS are critical, everywhere!!! It is funny-annoying how too many people take it for granted in this country, so much they get bored just thinking about it, but without it, we can't even begin to be a sustainable society. And that is true for African countries, all of you do-gooders out there - unless you are so in love with "indigenous people" that you want to keep us poor just for kicks!  Just like water sounds like the most boring thing to  and is under rated by most , without it there would be no Life the way we know it. Well jobs to me are to any sustainable society what water is to Life! Lose them and watch everything die around us, including us humans.
  • She perceived that the intellectual notion of business needs to be defended so that we can get more business friendly policies. For my part, I realized few years ago that being a good business person and creating jobs is not enough. Unfortunately "crapitalism" (term used by Gene Epstein, econ editor of Barron's to describe what happens when big business goes to bed with government ) has spoiled the well in people's minds. They think that the corrupt crapitalism that we see everywhere is capitalism - but it is not.  Most of us love small businesses for they are created by people like you and I, providing much-needed services and products to people who need and want them. Most of us admire such folks, and the fact they provide jobs that sustain entire families, help their communities thrive. And it is all based on free will. You buy from that company if you chose so, you work for it if you chose so, and so forth. We all love those principles. Those principle are what I call "capitalism", simply. Are those principles not worth defending for everything they have given us and how they improved our lives? Well if any one is still doubting, I am absolutely ALL OUT to defend those principles. The development of my country Senegal, and beyond that the development of the world depends on it. And right now, unfortunately , I am afraid that a lot of young people are being taught at universities (primarily) by misguided anti-business professors to hate and compromise those principles using the wrong examples. I am sadly seeing how these tenured professors at these well endowed universities, front row beneficiaries are teaching the children, grand-children, great-grandchildren of their greatest benefactors (business people who ran successful businesses who turned around and made donations to allow for those universities to be and function) to despise the very powerful forces that allowed their existence in the first place and subsistence to this day (even the way endowments works means these universities have to place their money in equities, i.e., real businesses). All of this just to say that I feel lucky that I opened my eyes early, which is why I am working at both level: being a real entrepreneur, as well as being an evangelist for business. I do not want to be like a lot of current business people who are just now realizing how our work is taken for granted and how much the anti-business people have managed to own the moral high ground on these issues. They were preaching against the healthy principles of business while we entrepreneurs were busy creating real value for all parties involved. The name of the game must change and we must DO and PREACH right now! We must win the moral high ground because that will allow for faster change, quicker! There is no reason why billions of people must remain poor and live in inhuman conditions for one second longer because a very few select group of people are too petty to recognize they have been wrong all along! I am furious! The "criticize by creating" is my mantra...ZEN....
  • Her spiritual beliefs. I love people who are still connected to the power of the Earth and the Ancestors who came before us. At the end of the day, the journey must be more about than just our little selves, because we are each a part of something so much bigger. So by the time I am hopefully peacefully about to give my last breath, I would like to be smiling feeling in my heart "God, I played my part. I am ready to come home now".
  • She is her own person and definitely not a sheep. At this point of my life, may God help the person that will try to tell me what I can't, nor shouldn't do. I am the ONLY qualified person to determine who/what I can, should or want to be/do!
ARGH!, CONs, But WHY?
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  • She is too bling-bling in her appearance and her lifestyle. Again for me true class is when money is not a factor because you have so much of it who cares or you have none and who cares.
  • She has gotten a very dirty mouth. While I love mouthy people I believe there is a true art to it, if not you are just a dirty mouth and there is nothing beautiful about that and you know how much I care about beauty. As a matter of fact, one of my upcoming blogs will be on the art of insult, inspired by the classy insults of back in the days, when there was no need for nasty "f" words and such yet you could still elegantly  make your point like Charles, Count Talleyrand's "In order to avoid being called a flirt, she always yielded easily".
  • Being an all woman should not mean harassing men all over the place.  Gross and distasteful!. There is nothing more fun and sensual than to ensnare a man in a web of love. But that is all one needs to do: build a web of love, an irresistible one, and they will come. Trust me :) So this below is just crazy, just as I thought I could not read worse about this woman's lack of class, taste and manners.
"This employee also says that Tilton perceives all of her male employees as being in love with her. Which is perhaps the reason that, holding court in a conference room during her 50th- birthday party, Tilton offered her male employees a choice: They could take a Jell-O shot off her stomach or lick whipped cream off her breasts. “The crazy part was, she saw it as morale building,” says one person present. “People were hiding in the bathroom.”"
If you have not left the building yet and want to read more, see the full article here.
By the way and at this point of my post, I must say that despite my dislikes about Lynn Tilton, I do appreciate and respect her. She has got what matters when it is all said and done: love, smarts, courage and sensuality.

Sufi Love

[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vKAylJYBNb4] Youssou Ndour is a friend, fellow countryman, and one of the best ambassadors of Senegal, at least on the artistic front.  One of the things that it is important to understand about my country is that we are a deeply religious country, committed to our Sufism, which has allowed us to be one of only two African nations never to have experienced a coup or civil war since Independence.

What do I love so much about the man? He is serious about Peace, real Peace, Love, real Love, and a Better World For Women. I love the fact he decided to stay home, in Senegal and prove that it is definitely possible to be a gigantic international star, straight from Africa! Most of us in Senegal feel that we are blessed with a "gene" of Peace, Tolerance and Love, that preserved us throughout times.

This is one my favorite songs from him, and you guessed it, it is all about  LOVE. Part of the song goes like this:

"Love is so good

Trust Us

I love you, and no one can extinguish that fire

Love, Love, O Love

Love is the making of God

Love comes out of a heart and goes into another heart

Love: no one can sell it and no one can buy at the market

Any two people you see, love binds them and God puts its blessing on it

Love has no religion

Love has no color for in the world of Love, there is no black person, and no white person"

We Senegalese Sufis are consumed with Peace, Tolerance and Love, when it is all said and done.

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My Charming Saudi Princess: Perhaps one of the Most Beautiful & Edgy Women I have ever Met

[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z4a8QtvOkBQ] It 's been a while since my last post. It was not a lack of inspiration, but rather a surplus of it. Michael (and before him my beloved late husband, Emmanuel) always says "why take pictures when the real thing is in front of you, to take in, unique moment that no technology could ever capture". I have lived a lot of such moments since I last posted on this blog.

But there is one moment that has been so overwhelming that I could not sit with it on my own much longer. Indeed and  although I rubbed elbows with many famous people in Saudi Arabia, including Bill Clinton, the most powerful experience I had in  Saudi Arabia was having tea with a charming young Saudi princess.  Princess ******* (she will recognize herself), at the age of 19, shatters all stereotypes most of the world may have of Saudi women.  She is poised and sophisticated, cheerful and smart, beautiful, casual and elegant all at the same time.  She takes edgy fashion photographs of her friends, she loves Lady Gaga and fashion from London's Dover Street, and she told us of an occasion on which she provoked Tony Blair with her questions on his policies towards Palestine.  He was so embarrassed and lost he had to call in his advisors for rescue, LOL. We discussed the role of showing female skin in the West and in Saudi Arabia, and the fact that we both respect tradition and modesty, on the one hand, and yet love beauty and fashion, on the other.  Just as I willingly respect the norms of Senegal when I am there (for instance my husband and I do not hold hands in public there), she willingly respects the norms of Saudi Arabia, walking with her head covered in public spaces - but taking her hood off and letting her hair down in private settings.  She loves her brother and argues with her father, whom she also loves, and successfully combines modernity and respect for her culture.  A true delight!

The Saudi men were exceptionally kind and warm to both me and my husband, and we both loved our time there.
But again the most surreal experience of all was tea at the Riyadh Four Seasons with the fascinating future of Saudi Arabia.
This is for you, my princess, perfect incarnation of the Tiossano Femme!
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Luxury is not Chic... Tiossano ç'est Chic!

I spent these past two years creating the mesmerizing scents for my upcoming line of Tiossano body care  products. I have been immersed in the world of scents and initiated to the art of perfume. I have been blessed to learn from some of  the world most renowned noses.  I also read from some of the most enlightening specialists. Amongst them is an interesting character, Luca Turin.

Luca Turin (1953 - ) is a biophysicist with a long-standing interest in the sense of smell, the art of perfume, and the fragrance industry. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Luca_Turin

A quotation from him in English that perfectly describes what my brand Tiossano draws from:

The French like luxury, but what the French call luxury is actually call-girl chic.  Put it this way.  After finishing secondary school at sixteen, I went back to Paris to go to university, Paris XII, Pierre et Marie Curie.  I rented a room from Madame Clouzot, the sister of the film director Henri-Georges Clouzot, right near the Champs Elysees.  She explained that there were only two great French perfume makers, Guerlain and Caron.  Guerlain, she said, was for cocottes – kept women.  Caron was for the duchesse.  But in fact it was 1880s cocotte style that passes for chic in France.  What the French consider 'chic' is actually kept-woman vulgarity. . . . Caron, on the other hand, is absolutely proper, proper chic. . . .  Chic is, first, when you don't have to prove that you have money, either because you have a lot and it doesn't matter or because you don't have any and it doesn't matter.  Chic is not aspirational. . . Chic is the most impossible thing to define.  Luxury is a humourless thing, largely, and when humor happens in luxury it happens involuntarily.  Chic is all about humor.  Which means chic is about intelligence.  And there has to be oddness – most luxury is conformist, and chic cannot be.  Chic must be polite and not incommode others, but within that it can be as weird as it wants.

Stay True To Your Dreams

Paul Coelho is one of my favorite writers, with the Alchemist & Brida at the top of my list when it comes to his books. His story is a fabulous real world example of the importance of staying true to your dreams.

"Paulo Coelho was born in Rio de Janeiro, Brazil.[1] He attended a Jesuit school. As a teenager, Coelho wanted to become a writer. Upon telling his mother this, she responded with "My dear, your father is an Engineer. He's a logical, reasonable man with a very clear vision of the world. Do you actually know what it means to be a writer?"[1] After researching, Coelho concluded that a writer "always wears glasses and never combs his hair" and has a "duty and an obligation never to be understood by his own generation," amongst other things.[1] At 17, Coelho's introversion and opposition to following a traditional path led to his parents committing him to a,mental institution from which he escaped three times before being released at the age of 20.[2][3] Coelho later remarked that "It wasn't that they wanted to hurt me, but they didn't know what to do... They did not do that to destroy me, they did that to save me.[4]

At his parents' wishes, Coelho enrolled in law school and abandoned his dream of becoming a writer. One year later, he dropped out and lived life as a hippie, traveling through South AmericaNorth AfricaMexico, and Europe and becoming immersed in thedrug culture of the 1960s.[5][6] Upon his return to Brazil, Coelho worked as a songwriter, composing lyrics for Elis ReginaRita Lee, and Brazilian icon Raul Seixas. Composing with Raul led to Paulo being associated with satanism and occultism, due to the content of some songs.[7] In 1974, Coelho was arrested and tortured for "subversive" activities by the ruling military government, who had taken power ten years earlier and viewed his lyrics as left-wing and dangerous.[4] Coelho also worked as an actor, journalist, and theatre director before pursuing his writing career.[7]

In 1986, Coelho walked the 500-plus mile Road of Santiago de Compostela in northwestern Spain, a turning point in his life.[5][8] On the path, Coelho had a spiritual awakening, which he described autobiographically in The Pilgrimage.[9] In an interview, Coelho stated "[In 1986], I was very happy in the things I was doing. I was doing something that gave me food and water -- to use the metaphor in "The Alchemist", I was working, I had a person who I loved, I had money, but I was not fulfilling my dream. My dream was, and still is, to be a writer."[10] Coelho would leave his lucrative career as a songwriter and pursue writing full-time.

Writing career

In 1982 Coelho published his first book, Hell Archives, which failed to make any kind of impact.[7] In 1986 he contributed to thePractical Manual of Vampirism, although he later tried to take it off the shelves since he considered it “of bad quality."[7] After making the pilgrimage to Santiago de Compostela in 1986, Coelho wrote The Pilgrimage. The following year, Coelho wrote The Alchemistand published it through a small Brazilian publishing house who made an initial print run of 900 copies and decided not to reprint.[11]He subsequently found a bigger publishing house, and with the publication of his next book Brida, The Alchemist became a Brazilian bestseller.[11] The Alchemist has gone on to sell more than 30 million copies, becoming one of the best-selling books in history, and has been translated into more than 67 languages, winning the Guinness World Record for most translated book by a living author.[7][12]"

I am in love with another man

Sir Seretse Khama and wife
Sir Seretse Khama and wife

I was just reading about Seretse Khama, the first president of Botswana, and I'm wondering why on earth we don't hear more about him. He was a hereditary king of one of the major tribes of Botswana, who was elected president of Botswana upon independence in 1966 and remained president until he died in 1980.

"From "close to the poorest" country in the world at the time of independence in the 1960s, and with few natural resources, an arid climate and little infrastructure, Botswana has transformed itself into an upper-middle-income nation, with the fastest rate of GDP growth (7.7 per cent per annum) in the world between 1966-1996 and 10.74 per cent between 1965 and 1975. [16] It achieved this by avoiding to follow the path most travelled in Africa, that of anti-capitalist, statist policy development. Instead, keeping much of the British common law and British-style institutions, and led by a visionary founding President, Seretse Khama, Botswana embarked on a series of reforms that reduced the government presence in the economy and promoted economic freedom (respect for rule of law, protection of property rights, disapproval of corruption, etc). As a result, government spending fell from 23 per cent in the mid-1960s to 15 per cent of GDP in the early 1970s."

The entire article can be found here.

Bostwana is now the second wealthiest nation on the continent of Africa (after Equatorial Guinea, a small oil rich nation), wealthier than all of North Africa and wealthier than South Africa. While it is true that Botswana's wealth is due to diamonds, Khama reinvested much of the wealth into health, education, and infrastructure, unlike most African leaders who had mineral resources. He also instituted strong anti-corruption policies. Today Botswana is the highest ranked African nation on Transparency International's Corruption Perceptions Index, at 33rd one of the least corrupt nations in the entire developing world, ahead of Costa Rica, Hungary, Taiwan, Italy, etc. Please note that the United States is at close 22nd place.

Moreover, diamonds weren't discovered in Botswana until 1972, thus the incredibly fast growth from 1965 to 1975 must be attributed to Khama's good governance, not to diamond wealth (I doubt the diamonds had a large impact on the economy the first year or two after they were discovered; it takes a while to get a diamond mine into production).  At independence, Botswana was the third poorest nation in the world.  And, in part, I suspect that the fact that he had good governance in place BEFORE the discovery of diamonds helped protect Botswana from the resource curse.

He sounds like simply a fabulous leader, a real African hero. And I can't help but notice how handsome and regal he looks :)

He was also exiled from political office before independence, due to his inter-racial marriage which the South Africans hated. Indeed, curiously his inter-racial marriage helped to keep Botswana independent of South Africa:

"After World War II, the British attempted to combine the Bechuanaland Protectorate with their South African colony, but Bechuanaland was able to thwart this annexation attempt. Two important events helped to keep the Bechuanaland Protectorate independent from the South African colony. First, a strong nationalistic current continued after World War II. In 1948, the National Party, a well-organized party that favored an independent Bechuanaland Protectorate, was formed.More important, Chief Seretse Khama of Bechuanaland was banned from the protectorate in 1948. He studied in England and was not allowed to return to Bechunaland because he had married a white Englishwoman. The British hoped the ban would ease tensions in South Africa. South Africa’s white leadership found the interracial marriage to be repulsive, and they insisted that Khama be prohibited from ruling Bechuanaland. Since most people in Bechuanaland supported Khama, this political issue divided South Africa and Bechuanaland. In 1956, Khama rescinded his claim to chieftainship and returned to Bechunaland."

http://www.cato.org/pubs/journal/cj23n2/cj23n2-6.pdf

Also, as it turns out, Botswana successfully combined traditional tribal law with British Common Law (probably because Khama was both an African chief, and thus knew and supported traditional tribal law, as well as an Oxford-trained British lawyer). Basically the Cato article cited above makes the case that Khama's leadership, which included also support for freedom of speech and for harmony between blacks and whites, as well as good legal institutions and a pro-market, pro-investment approach, is the essential reason why Botswana has been so successful. Perhaps there is something less than perfect about him, but from everything I'm reading he sounds like a truly great African leader who ought to be more widely known and recognized. For my part, I am simply in love!

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Seretse_Khama

Sheep Souls, Cheap Rewards

Michael and I love to be together. He does not want to go anywhere without me so we usually travel everywhere together. Our common and almost religious devotion to The True, The Good and the Beautiful (for him, The Noble for me) is a powerful garden within which we cultivate and watch our souls blossom, irrigated and fed by the power of our love. And if you see us, chances are you often times will hear us engaged in a profound conversation, him with a sexy beaming reason and me with a persuasive passion. We are the Ying and the Yang, truly "seemingly contrary forces interconnected and interdependent in the natural world, giving rise to each other in turn". And we also write to each other, almost all the time. The whole thing is so intense I feel we will be speaking to each other way past our time on this Earth. I find our communication powerful because we are honest with one another, and we keep each other honest, and hold ourselves accountable to one another.

Michael is an accomplished philosopher of life who I feel no one can deter from his goal of living a life of meaning. On the other end, I am still a young disciple of Life, sometimes whining about the difficulty of the path I have chosen to live MY life, no matter what and no matter who.

But although I am very conscious and aware of the fact that only such people bring innovation and newness to the world, I do whine sometimes :(

It was after I wasted valuable time complaining about the world, people and life, in general, that Michael sent me this letter, reminding me of what I know all too well: that Sheep Souls get Cheap Rewards.

"Reality is a really, really tough cookie.

It is much easier, either in France, Senegal, or the U.S., to be a Mandarin: Go to a good university, and then get a good job in the elite hierarchy because of your degree and the friends you made at the university. You are then a sheep, but an elite sheep. You have financial security and status security. Everyone knows that because you went to such and such a school and now have such and such a post (whether in government or the corporate world), that you are deserving of such and such respect.

The problem is, both you and I believe that this entire system is more or less total bullshit.

Neither you nor I could live in that system if we tried. We would do anything to avoid living in that system.

But most of the world believes in that system.

Bummer!

Major bummer!!!!

Dammit, we have to create our own world, our own enterprises, find our own money, our own markets, our own customers, our own team, etc.

Much, much, much harder to do.

But it is the only way, the ONLY WAY, that either you or I can look ourselves in the eye each day and respect ourselves.

It doesn't mean that we absolutely have to start our own companies. But it does mean that we have to work for organizations that:

1. Produce something of real value.

2. Are based internally on real merit.

And most old organizations, government or corporate, are not really doing that.

So mostly we'll end up either working for or starting new orgs, where there is no security financially and no security status-wise.

But, in the end, much, much greater rewards."  -Michael Strong

 

Entrepreneurship: Best Path to Personal Growth

The exert below exemplifies very well why a wonderful entrepreneurial friend of ours, Donna Hadjipopov, told my husband Michael that "entrepreneurship  is the highest form of personal growth".

How right is Donna!

1. You’re going to be tested. Hammered, actually. When I started my journey as an entrepreneur, my vision was fixed on the financial rewards of growing a business. I had no way of knowing how many great personal tests I would face along the way. I was too inexperienced to anticipate how market factors, competitive pressures, cash constraints, and managing employees would create an environment of nearly constant pressure. New twists, turns, and surprises surface with exhausting frequency. There’s a wise saying that “…hammering hardens steel and plays havoc on putty.” It’s the opportunity for you to become strengthened and refined under the heat and hammering of business challenges. Sadly, many wilt, falter, or fail under these circumstances. So be prepared to face and conquer real-life tests as an entrepreneur and to be better for it.

 

2. You’re going to fail. That’s a good thing. Think of failure as the toll paid for future success. Every great success story includes painful chapters of failure and misstep. It’s a fact that through failure, questions are answered and solutions are discovered. Og Mandino said, “Failure is the highway to success, as every discovery we make of what is false leads us to earnestly seek after what is true and points out some error which we shall afterward carefully avoid.” And it’s the experience of failure that breeds the ability to be flexible, humble, and thoughtful—qualities required to create a company that can stand the test of time. Flexibility, humility, and thoughtfulness go a long way in life, too.

 

3. You’re going to learn patience. It develops as a natural result of the hammering and the failures that you’re sure to experience.Patience is the trait that truly separates inexperienced entrepreneurs from the seasoned and successful. Patience earned through experience is what allows a business operator to get beyond idealistic dreams and deal in the world of sound, realistic expectations. Pray that it develops within you as soon as possible.

 

4. You’re going to have a major impact on people. It’s inevitable. People—perhaps many people—are going to give a portion of their lives to your cause. This isn’t a small thing. Your actions toward your customers, vendors, and especially your employeeswill have a positive or negative impact on their lives. You will learn that managing people is really about leadership, and leadership is about inspiring people to reach their full potential. In The 8th Habit, Stephen Covey explains that it is absolutely crucial that we “…find our voice and inspire others to find theirs.” And again, from Drucker, “Management is about human beings. Its task is to make their strengths effective and their weaknesses irrelevant.” I hope that as you build your company, you will find that it is an ideal platform for doing much more than selling widgets—the opportunity is there to change many lives for good.

 

5. You’re going to develop character. Sure, you might get rich, retire young, and travel the world, too. But realize that this isn’t really the end game. In time (sooner rather than later, with any luck), you’ll recognize that building a business is much different than what you might have initially envisioned. If you choose to pay the price for success, you’ll find that it’s actually much harder than most accounts of business success would suggest. But through that hardship, great rewards are available. While there is no guarantee of riches, through the pursuit, you will obtainrewards of character. And the development of sound character is perhaps the most important perk of entrepreneurship. At the end of the day, no one really cares how much money you made. They care about who you are."

More here

 

Cowgirl Code

On this blog post, I saw the following and very interesting concept of "Cowboy Code". While my answer to the author is that I think Capital Hill should adopt this ideology, I also would love to see more girls and women adopt it too! More dignity and honor would be  great for a change, and I believe we, the ladies-chicks-nanas (whatever you want to call yourself) have a great role model opportunity to shape the world to be a better place:

Here are the Ten Principles of Cowboy Ethics:

1. Live each day with courage

2. Take pride in your work

3. Always finish what you start

4. Do what has to be done

5. Be tough, but fair

6. When you make a promise, keep it

7. Ride for the brand

8. Talk less and say more

9. Remember that some things aren’t for sale

10. Know where to draw the line"

 

"Screw the girl power of the 90s, Give me some woman power"

I often times write with music in the background. So get the full experience and click here to listen to the Lady Gaga track I was listening to while writing this.

Q: What do you think the following people have in common:

A very handsome middle-aged  litigation attorney in an elevator ride to his San Francisco office, A gorgeous voluptuous big lipped  red hair woman at an antique sale, A sexy married indian man dancing with me at a party, A young and dynamic saleswoman following me around in a hip clothing store, My "no-words-in-the-book-to-describe-him" husband, Michael, every time he gets a chance, And countless others...

A: They all whispered to my ear: "What is your perfume? It is driving me crazy!". I smile with delight and whisper back "Poême" (de Lancôme).

Poême has been my most reliable companion since 2002, while on one of my many trips to Tahiti. I worship Tahiti for the incomparable beauty of her islands and magic of her people. Anytime Life throws a big challenge at me, that is where I go to regroup and recharge before fighting back.

I never understood my attachment to Poême. It is even more strange given I could not even tell you what it smells like (I can' smell it on me anymore), but I would recognize its scent out of a million! Michael is convinced that the chemistry between the two scents (Poême and my skin), creates an even more wonderful and unique smell.

In the end, this review of Poême could have come from me for I so relate to it:

"I’ve recently rediscovered this 1995 release by perfumer Jacques Cavallier (via Now Smell This) and it’s just as sumptuous as I’d remembered it. It’s not the most well loved of Lancome fragrances, and small wonder at that. For all the thick, cozy warmth, it’s nevertheless so strong that it hits some folks like a bitchslap in a mitten. Poeme’s composition is so chock full o’ notes that it reminds me of how Givenchy’s Amarige can be received: No two people will notice the exact same notes at any one time. On me, Poeme seems front-loaded with peach and tuberose, with a distinctly smokey undertone of woody amber and what I keep imagining is “violet leaf.” My nose lies to me, because I think my “violet leaf” is supposed to “vetiver.” I like my husband’s impression of Poeme best; When asked his opinion of it on my wrist, he shook his head ruefully and said, “That is what you wear to crush the competition in a room.” Ha! And maybe that’s why I like it. Screw the girl power of the 90s, give me some woman power." More here."

Africa is not part of the World

[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gyGHHxUFY6w] As many of you know, I love The Onion because humor is often the best way to get a message across, however sad, revolting or outrageous the message may be.

So got the message?

Let's wake up and realize that Africa IS part of the World's Economy (as a matter of fact, in recent years the economic growth of Africa has been at or above the rate of growth in the developed world).

And to those so-called do-gooders out there who believe that "plumbing, door knobs and electricity will violate our culture", I answer again that we are tired of being your anthropological wet dream.

Paradoxical Commandments

People are illogical, unreasonable, and self-centered.
Love them anyway.
If you do good, people will accuse you of selfish ulterior motives.
Do good anyway.
If you are successful, you will win false friends and true enemies.
Succeed anyway.
The good you do today will be forgotten tomorrow.
Do good anyway.
Honesty and frankness make you vulnerable.
Be honest and frank anyway.
The biggest men and women with the biggest ideas can be shot down by the smallest men and women with the smallest minds.
Think big anyway.
People favor underdogs but follow only top dogs.
Fight for a few underdogs anyway.
What you spend years building may be destroyed overnight.
Build anyway.
People really need help but may attack you if you do help them.
Help people anyway.
Give the world the best you have and you'll get kicked in the teeth.
Give the world the best you have anyway.
The Paradoxical Commandments by Dr. Kent M. Keith

"Hot Monogamy"

Given the fact that I do not want to promote sluttiness  or promiscuity in look, style, and behavior, I am very interested in sharing with women the secrets of using Tiossano's rituals and material on "The Origins of Sensuality" to land a good man and achieve "Hot Monogamy," a major theme these days.

For instance, see this excellent survey on sex and monogamy, with results that I've seen in many other studies, basically proving that women LOVE monogamy and prefer monogamous sex.  Note that the survey was done by Elle Magazine, the #1 fashion magazine for women.  With nearly 80,000 people responding, this is not a small sample size:

Is monogamy hot or not? For many women, the answer is “yeah, baby!” Women of all ages say they’re enjoying sex with their partner more now than they used to, according to results of the new ELLE/MSNBC.com Sex and Love Survey. For many men, however, giving up the thrill of the chase means giving up some thrills in the bedroom as well.

A record 77,895 adults took the online reader survey over two weeks in February, answering more than two dozen questions about what works and what doesn't in their sex lives. Nine out of 10 reported being in monogamous relationships.

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/12410071/

Well worth reading the article on the survey results all the way through to get evidence on what women really want.  So if through Tiossano I can also help women keep their men happy, then maybe we will all win . . . There is a whole industry devoted to "Hot Monogamy" because both men and women want it, especially in the age of AIDS, herpes and other nasties.

This two-day training qualifies you to conduct the Hot Monogamy Program as a workshop, course, retreat, or seminar in several different forms:

•    Looking for Passion in All the Wrong Places •    Celebrating the Excitement of Marriage •    Creating Passion and Intimacy in Marriage •    Sacred Sexuality: Incorporating Deep Intimacy into Marriage •    Deepening Commitment through Love and Intimacy •    Bridge Over Troubled Water: Using Intimate Connection to Heal the Past

http://www.smartmarriages.com/hot.html

Spiritual Initiation better than an MBA?

I was just introduced to a beautiful book: The Death of Religion and the Rebirth of Spirit, by Joseph Chilton Pearce. The excerpts below from the book provide what I believe is a fabulous description of why I believe in my Sufi Guide.  Although the author of the book is using the example of Australian Aborigines, this is a great description of why I believe that indigenous cultures have not only wisdom, but actual mental/spiritual/cognitive capacities that have been lost in the modern world:

“Should we as a species become tone-deaf – that is, lose our capacity for tonal discrimination – we would be unable to perceive music as a sensory phenomenon or even comprehend the word music. It would be impossible for us to grasp that we had lost something if we had no neural system for experiencing that which was lost. We might at some point read of an ancient society that had once all but worshiped a phenomenon they called music, but we couldn’t explain this phenomenon outside of its own parameters of sensation because it has no metaphoric equivalents. We can’t say music is like anything. Tone, for instance, is what it is, not what it is like. And, for a tone-deaf species, music would be a useless, meaningless word without referent. If we follow this analogy, we might understand Robert Wolff’s deep frustration at trying to get across to us what the Senoi had opened him to. Indeed we have no idea of what we have lost.

A society or race that has developed a brain system involved in states of consciousness might never be comprehended or even perceived by an object-oriented brain-mind capable only of re-creating objectified things and altering nature, and , at the same time, knowing nothing of subjective internal states or experience. Such an object-oriented society might never know that some people might have nurtured and tended states of consciousness until they had evolved to astonishing heights and even become self-sustaining outside all physical aspects. Only a brain-mind that had likewise developed could comprehend and resonate with such beings.”

Joseph Chilton Pearce The Death of Religion and the Rebirth of Spirit p.180

As I read this, I had to consider the implications of my Guide's belief that I have even stronger powers than he has - a belief that I used to consider to be unimaginable, but  now, because I trust my Guide, I trust completely is true.

The notion of "Be true to your voice," while accurate, is only the faintest shadow of the kind of capabilities we all have within us.  Once you learn to listen, really, really, deeply listen, to the deepest, truest voice within you, you will be truly extraordinary.  In my case, I guess that it is for this reason that my precious beloved Michael suggested a little while ago I spend a few years in Senegal mentoring with my Guide, rather than going to get an MBA (I had been talking about taking time off from starting up Tiossano to get an MBA).  He really was not just challenging me; he believes that for me, apprenticing with my Guide would be a much more valuable use of my time than is getting an MBA.  Now, I agree.  I see on the one hand, that getting an MBA, even from Harvard, would not teach me anything about entrepreneurship.  On the other hand, I see that many of my fears and weaknesses come from not being in touch with my deepest abilities, whereas many of my best decisions and best insights come from being in touch with that part of my being.  And now I am convinced that I myself barely know what I am capable of perceiving, and that an apprenticeship with my Guide would open up entirely new worlds of perception for me, worlds which would make me a happier, better, and more capable human being.

I honestly don't know what the right path is for each of us, but I do believe that we all have truly extraordinary abilities that are untapped within us, that are mostly contaminated with fear and anger and uncertainty and doubt and resentment and ten thousand irrelevant emotions. If we can simply transcend all the emotional crap that keeps us down, we will truly, truly be invincible and amazing and dazzling and beautiful and we will transform the world, completely, and deeply than is the case even in our wildest, most private, most ambitious, most insanely over-the-top "I am great" dreams.  So release yourselves, Gods and Goddesses, for we so need you in this world. Now!

So, spiritual initiation anyone? :)

Addictions worse than alcohol, drugs, food, gambling or sex combined

This HuffPo post caught my eye recently (see main exerpt below):

"The Four Addictions

I've discovered four addictions we all have that destroy more dreams, more hopes and more lives than alcohol, drugs, food, gambling or sex combined. When I refer to addictions, I am not focused on any of these. To me, those are habitual symptoms or effects brought on by four much larger causes that are the root cause of those symptoms.

They are:

1) The Addiction to opinions of other people. As a society, we're addicted to what others think about us and how others' views of the world affect us.

2) The Addiction to drama. Some people are drawn to and consumed by any event or situation that occupies their thoughts and fills their mind with negativity, which often brings attention to them in unproductive ways.

3) The Addiction to the past. These people have an unhealthy attachment to events or situations that have occurred in the past. They're stuck in how things used to be.

4) The Addiction to worry. This addiction is comprised of all the negative and self-defeating thoughts that make us anxious, disturbed, upset and stressed, that hold us back in life."

The post is of interest to me because I used to have severe cases of all four addictions discussed, especially addiction 2 (I have a collection of T-shirts reading "Drama Queen" my late husband offered me) and 4 (I used to feel that the best way to succeed at something was to worry about it to death, almost literally).

I can proudly say that today, I almost got rid off addiction 1 given that since I realized that most people are sheep and most people have no clue what they are talking about anyway, why would I subject myself to the opinion of anyone? Accepting to be at the mercy of other people's opinion is the same as accepting to be in the situation where the "blind is leading the clueless". Originality is the ultimate gift, the one human character that has provided us with all the evolution we enjoy so much to this day. Original people are changing our wold constantly from Socrates, to Leonardo Da Vinci, to the Google Boys, to my beloved Michael (his ideas are wild and will change the world!). It is not easy to remain original and it is a very lonely state, but boy is it addictive! A good addiction though :)!

Should I also add that caring too much about other's opinions diminishes our courage to do what needs to be done, especially when what needs to be done is unpopular or will make you look like the devil to a bunch that tries to decide for everyone else?

As for addiction number 3, I am not sure where I stand on that one. All I can say is that I am attached to traditions, but good and healthy traditions, the ones that made me feel so good that I would love to pass it down to anyone I have the chance to pass it on to. But I have no patience for events of the past that are simply irrelevant aujourd'hui, nor old ways to do things that do not make or keep us better off.

Overall, I agree with the author that any or a combination of any of these addictions has greater negative consequences than any of the usual addiction suspects. These four addictions are indeed affecting the deeper part of us, become part of our ESSENCE, and they do prevent us from a being the happy, healthy, capable people we all crave to be. And if our souls and consciences are sick, then we will try to numb them with  alcohol and/or drugs and/or food and/or gambling and/or sex... or anything that one person can leap into  in order to numb the pain caused by such deeply rooted disease...

I urge you to read each one very carefully, and ask your self if and how this applies to you. Please be honest with yourself. And if you want to push the exercise further, then ask a trusted loved one how they think you fare on each addiction. It will hurt to hear the diagnosis but it is necessary if you really want to regain your freedom. Per example, I did not appreciate at all having to admit that I cared about other people's opinion to a degree that it was a liability for me. Moi, Magatte Wade, Queen of Attitude and Femme Flamboyante, slave of other people's thoughts? No way! You just don't understand!!! But yes way! So Michael and I embarked on a journey  where he introduced me to the heroic tales of great human beings (especially Leonardo Da Vinci and Socrates, his two great heroes). And because I care so much about entrepreneurship, he also used the examples of amazing entrepreneurs that did succeed because  they did not care what others thought (like the founder of Fedex who got an F on his paper describing his vision for FEDEX, his professor said it could not be done...).

So what is/are your addiction(s) and most importantly, how are you addressing them?

"The Great Yogurt Conspiracy"

Don't you think we ought to be able to put whatever we want down there?  I mean really, do you want the government telling you what you can and can't put down there?  Think about it . . .

"The Great Yogurt Conspiracy

In September 1972, two founders of the Federation of Feminist Women's Health Centers, Carol Downer and Colleen Wilson were arrested for allegedly practicing medicine without a license. Their Los Angeles Self-Help Clinic was raided by the California Department of Consumer Affairs and the Board of Medical Examiners. The Self-Help Clinic presented the local medical establishment with competition. Concerned with the potential loss of revenue for the local physicians, one doctor, three uniformed police and several plainclothes investigators confiscated four truckloads of supplies and equipment, in order to shut down operations of the women-controlled clinic. The reason for the arrest? Downer had inserted yogurt into the vagina of a women's center staff member.

The trial became known as the, "Great Yogurt Conspiracy" and was a crucial turning point in the women's health movement. Downer was found not guilty by arguing that applying yogurt as a home remedy for an ordinary yeast infection is not practicing medicine. The verdict reinforced women's control over their own bodies and established that at-home methods of self-care are, indeed, lawful."

Read more here.